In the past six years or so since I began my journey into the world of ultras I have set and accomplished a lot of wonderful goals. I have attempted four 100 mile races, finishing three out of the four. I have ran 100 miles in under 24 hours twice, ran a distance PR of 108 miles in 24 hours, and gradually improved my times in distances from 5k, to 50k to 100 miles. More importantly than all of this, I've learned to listen to my body and HOW to listen to my body. I've pushed beyond what I thought my limits were and I've become a much stronger person through all of this toil. Well, I took on an all new ultra running challenge this weekend.
As I've said many times before, none of this would ever be possible without my wife Angie, and our kiddos, Xander and Izabella. They supported me on yet another crazy adventure this weekend. I can guarantee that had they not been there for me, I would not have finished this race.
Painful Elimination is a special kind of running event. There have been a few like it popping up over the past couple of years, and I have been intrigued by them from the first time I saw one. This race was a 4 mph challenge. Everyone tows the line at 6am for the race start. You have one hour to complete a 4.25 mile loop. If you aren't back and at the starting line by the top of the next hour, you're eleminated. If you get back before the next hour begins, you have to wait to start with everyone else at the beginning of the next hour.
The reason I took this race on is because I knew it would be tough. I love the heat and humidity of summer, but it beats me up during ultras. I have a tough time keeping my core body temp down, and overheat easily. This manifests as stomach issues varying from minor to holy fuck. Typically I counteract this by taking significant breaks (of 20 mins or more) in the midday heat to soak in some icy cold water in my kiddie pool. Being a late August race, and a format that doesn't allow for much downtime, I knew this would be a risk. This risk is exactly what drove me to want to take on this race. I was looking for a new kind of challenge.
Painful Elimination was in Hudson, Illinois, a six hour drive (or seven with kids and my tiny bladder :), so I opted to take Friday off work in order to get to our hotel early and be able to make packet pick-up. My unbelievably awesome Angie got the car pre-packed for us, so there was just my gear to stuff in on Friday. I knew I'd be taking my special kiddie princess pool Ang found me at a yard sale (SCORE!) along with us. I had spoken to one of the RDs online and discovered there was no access to water (beyond that for the runners to drink :/) at the race start, so we had to pack three full igloos of water to fill my pool. I am a high maintenance dude!
Once the car was stuffed full we took our traditional family starting their road trip pic, and headed out on our newest adventure! Xan and Izzy are headed back to school next week so we planned this trip to be a last fun mini-vacation too.
The trip went pretty fast, offering gorgeous views of the enormous windmills in Illinois along the way. Our hotel was a great find by Awesome Angie, with a nice pool and the hugest room ever. It had practically a full kichen and the room itself was nearly twice as wide as your typical Holiday Inn Express or what-have-you. Awesomeness!
We had just enough time upon arriving- thanks to the time zone difference- to grap my shirt and bib. The shirt was really unique and cool, and the bibs were recycled from another event. I knew this was my kind of race :)
After settling in we headed out to Bob Evans for some din-din and then hit the pool afterwards.
And here is where I stray from my race tale to make fun of a fucking pervert asshole. When we went into the pool area there was a dude a bit older than me and a little boy wresting around in the pool. Shortly after my kiddos hopped in the water, while I'm still dangling my feet along the pool's edge, these two get out. I took them to be father and son. The dad wraps a hand-towel around himself and proceeds to pull off his damn swim trunks under it, while standing in full view of me and the kids. The boy stands there waiting and then takes the trunks to one of those spin-dryer extractor deals. The dad then slips a dry pair of shorts on, holding this tiny fucking towel in one hand and giving us way too much of a show. Here are my biggest problems with this situation: (1) There was a fucking bathroom about 30 steps away. (2) The dryer thing was actually back in a nook that provided total privacy. (3) Go to your fucking room and change like a decent human being.
If I'm at a race and there is no where for me to get some real privacy, I'll absolutely do a towel change like that. But I make sure there are no children around and I sure as fuck won't stand in front of a crowd just for kicks. I made fun of the guy loudly but I really wish I had said something directly to him like, "Hey dueschbag, this ain't a lockerroom. How about you take your saggy balls up to your own room for that?" But I digress.
After the pool I packed up my gear for the morning and opted to sleep in my running clothes because it saves a ton of time in the morning and we were planning a 4am wakeup time. This was only the second year for the race and they had way more people sign up than expected. After seeing the small parking area and even smaller section reserved for setting up our pop-up tent, we knew we better get there early. We were right!
After my prep was done, we all settled in to watch a couple episodes of Roseanne before bed. Aaaahhhhhhh.
4am came awful early. Soon we were lugging gear and setting up the tent and pool. Angie, Xan and Izabella all saw me off at the start. They were waiting to cheer me in at the end of the first loop, and had made me a fantastic poster with a picture of me running and little feet to attach at the start of each new hour :) I'm one lucky son-of-a-bitch! Izzy had made me some other good luck drawings on the trip down, so my tent was done up right!
Ang and our kiddos ventured back to the hotel and then into Normal where they were heading to a cool children's museum and found themselves smack dab in the middle of their annual corn and blues festival! Normal is a cool little college town anyways. Between the festival and the museum they had a blast; so much so they opted to take me back there on Sunday for the family vacay part of our trip. It was an absolute blast!
Back at the race..
The loop wasn't too difficult...the first few times :) It didn't offer a ton of technical stuff, with the exception of a scattering of roots here in there in the short "true trail" section where we were actually in the woods. There were a couple of small hills. The toughest part for me was also the flattest...because it was completely without shade.
All runners began every loop together, at the top of each hour. This made things extra fun because far more people signed up for this second installment of the event than did the first year. With 75+ people all finagling for position, it took me a couple of loops to determine how to pace myself in order to get through the sunny first mile or so, and still be going into the single-track in a good location in the pack.
The loop started on a grassy park "service road". It was wide enough to run four abreast or so. Following this road we crossed a seriously scary bridge :) Anyone who has ran my 50s For Yo Momma race in Circleville, OH, is aware that I know a little something about bouncy bridges. Our course has a nice bridge that will shoot you up like a trampoline, especially if you are on it with someone else running as well. But the Painful Elimination bridge was a whole other animal. It was about 6' wide and....well...twisted. Imagine a giant grabbing this son-of-a-bitch like a wet towel and just wringing it out. With so many of us running across it at once, it was more than a bit terrifying. As the crowds dwindled throughout the day, I figured out the right path to take across it to all but eliminate the bounce; though my fear of it never fell away completely.
After the bridge of death, we meandered along the road, through some tall grass. A little less than a mile in, we hit some wonderful single-track. This was just a short jaunt to get us to the creek crossing. This creek crossing was one of my favorite parts of the course. The day began warming up quickly and the humidity was on the rise as well. The icy water was just over knee-deep and felt wonderful. I came close to lying down in it several times throughout the day!
What I enjoyed even more were the hilarious comments I heard the first two times we crossed it. The website and pre-race email clearly stated that there would be a creek crossing and that you WOULD get your feet wet. All part of trail running, right? Well I thought so, but at least fifteen people in front of me on the first loop disagreed. People were tippy-toeing down the hill and looking for any way they could find AROUND the creek. Keep in mind this creek was too wide to jump, especially because of the steep grade of the hill leading down to it's bank, as well as the angle of approach, as there was a 90 degree turn just before the plunge. It's funny to think on now, but at the time it sucked because we were still on single-track and there was no good way to pass the slew of folks pussy-footing there way across. I resigned myself to wait more or less patiently. Grumble grumble.
This makes a great spot for a segway into other hilarious things I heard on those first couple of loops. There were all the quintessential race conversations nearly all of us are guilty of: which shoes are the best; what new shoes someone just got; how many miles can you put on shoes; what kind of hydration system do you use; elctrolytes- pro or con; other races to run; other races someone has ran; DNF's; PR's; OMG; LOL. Then there was the narrator. Captain Obvious. The guy who gave everyone around him a play-by-play of exactly what we were all seeing transpire right before our very eyes. I took all this in, smiling gratefully for the welcome entertainment.
On the other side of the creek was a relatively steep hill, which of course became super sloppy as the day wore on. Next was more running in essentially an open field in the sun- yay! After a quarter of a mile or so, we hit the real trail section of the course, running on some great single track with a few hills. I thoroughly enjoyed this section each and every time I got to it.
There was one great spot about halfway along where the trail dropped down steeply, then shot back up the next hill, with a very large vine hanging across the path. Part way through the day I whacked my head on that damn vine in a true Abbott & Costello moment.
Unfortunately, the single track ended right back where it started, dropping us back into the unforgiving sun. But this is why I was there- the challenge.
The first few laps went well. 47 minutes. 43 minutes. 44. 45.46.47:30. 50. I kept right around that 50 minute mark for the rest of the day, with only the last two loops cutting er' a little close.
I felt relatively well until loop number eight. All the hours running in the heat was finally catching up with me. My stomach started to get a little out of whack. I had my kiddie pool and it was definitely helping- not to mention a blast to flop into while most folks around had a chuckle at the site.
By the last loop I was feeling like crap on toast. Food was going down well all day, but I made the mistake of drinking half an Ensure on two consecutive loops. Still being Paleo, I can usually do small amounts of sugar during races. My stomach was growling like a fucking bear so I opted for some quick calories and paid the price. My stomach rebelled. Thankfully I was able to keep my shit together for the last couple of hours and get er' done.
The final loop was excellent because I was able to push through all that pain and actually run fast enough to catch up to a couple of the leaders! I ran with Meghan Kennihan and another fella whose name I didn't get. They were both great people and let me tag along for the last half the loop. Thank goodness they did! They really helped me to push it out for a strong finish.
On a side note- Meghan was a total beast! She looked like a million bucks all day, never showed any signs of fatigue, and continued running while the rest of us slackers were laying in pools or keeled over in camp chairs, waiting for the next loop to start.
As we walked it out in the sun during the final stretch, another nice fella came up from behind and joined us too! As we all approached the finish for the last time, I asked if everyone was cool with crossing the line together. They all were! The four of us ran it in together for a 4-way tie for second place! Yay!
Xander and Izabella had made me some cool surprises at the awesome kids' museum in Normal. Izzy had also made me some sweet new knitted arm sleeves and crafts. My kids totally rule!
I had planned on all of us heading out to a movie after the race- after all, it was ONLY 12 hours, right? Unfortunately, my damn stomach totally rebelled, and I spent the rest of the night curled up in bed. However, we had brought along a full season of Roseanne, so we all enjoyed an evening of hysterical, blue-collar humor.
The next day was the bomb. Ang and the kiddos took me to Normal! We scouted out the festival, witnessed an awesome corn on the cob eating contest, toured a great used book store, and spent a couple of hours hosting puppet shows and making art in the kids' museum.
Fantastic adventure!
The thing is, I was left with this feeling after the race. It was the same thing I felt after O24. Of course I felt a huge sense of accomplishment. I had redefined my own limits again, and it was amazing. However, there is this deeper sensation that it's time to take on some new challenges. Enter....breakdancing!
There was one great spot about halfway along where the trail dropped down steeply, then shot back up the next hill, with a very large vine hanging across the path. Part way through the day I whacked my head on that damn vine in a true Abbott & Costello moment.
Unfortunately, the single track ended right back where it started, dropping us back into the unforgiving sun. But this is why I was there- the challenge.
The first few laps went well. 47 minutes. 43 minutes. 44. 45.46.47:30. 50. I kept right around that 50 minute mark for the rest of the day, with only the last two loops cutting er' a little close.
I felt relatively well until loop number eight. All the hours running in the heat was finally catching up with me. My stomach started to get a little out of whack. I had my kiddie pool and it was definitely helping- not to mention a blast to flop into while most folks around had a chuckle at the site.
By the last loop I was feeling like crap on toast. Food was going down well all day, but I made the mistake of drinking half an Ensure on two consecutive loops. Still being Paleo, I can usually do small amounts of sugar during races. My stomach was growling like a fucking bear so I opted for some quick calories and paid the price. My stomach rebelled. Thankfully I was able to keep my shit together for the last couple of hours and get er' done.
The final loop was excellent because I was able to push through all that pain and actually run fast enough to catch up to a couple of the leaders! I ran with Meghan Kennihan and another fella whose name I didn't get. They were both great people and let me tag along for the last half the loop. Thank goodness they did! They really helped me to push it out for a strong finish.
On a side note- Meghan was a total beast! She looked like a million bucks all day, never showed any signs of fatigue, and continued running while the rest of us slackers were laying in pools or keeled over in camp chairs, waiting for the next loop to start.
As we walked it out in the sun during the final stretch, another nice fella came up from behind and joined us too! As we all approached the finish for the last time, I asked if everyone was cool with crossing the line together. They all were! The four of us ran it in together for a 4-way tie for second place! Yay!
Afterwards my awesome family took care of me. Angie had everything packed up and ready to go by the time I was finished. After a few quick pictures and collecting my trophy (Yay!), we headed back to the hotel.
Xander and Izabella had made me some cool surprises at the awesome kids' museum in Normal. Izzy had also made me some sweet new knitted arm sleeves and crafts. My kids totally rule!
I had planned on all of us heading out to a movie after the race- after all, it was ONLY 12 hours, right? Unfortunately, my damn stomach totally rebelled, and I spent the rest of the night curled up in bed. However, we had brought along a full season of Roseanne, so we all enjoyed an evening of hysterical, blue-collar humor.
The next day was the bomb. Ang and the kiddos took me to Normal! We scouted out the festival, witnessed an awesome corn on the cob eating contest, toured a great used book store, and spent a couple of hours hosting puppet shows and making art in the kids' museum.
Fantastic adventure!
The thing is, I was left with this feeling after the race. It was the same thing I felt after O24. Of course I felt a huge sense of accomplishment. I had redefined my own limits again, and it was amazing. However, there is this deeper sensation that it's time to take on some new challenges. Enter....breakdancing!
